I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
