I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
