i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize