She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Randomize
