fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
