You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
