hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I think people are normalizing furries
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
