so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
