why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
