clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
23 Fathers Confess The Best Way They’ve Messed With Their Daughter’s Boyfriend
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
25 Children of Helicopter Parents Admit The Most Horrible Thing They Were Put Through
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY