she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
