If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
tonight lets celebrate not being married
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
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