She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize