That's when you crack a 10am beer
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Randomize