I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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