Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
