STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
