he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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