I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize