i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
