North Korea, Best Korea!
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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