I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
