Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
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