There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Randomize