That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Randomize
