Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
