If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
