No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Of course I have a pirate flag
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
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