so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
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