Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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