i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
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