between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Randomize
