But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Randomize
