Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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