Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Randomize
