May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
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