she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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