I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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