You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize
