Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
