Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
