Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
i think my cat just said my name.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
