i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
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