so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
