I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
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