No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Randomize
