I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
