yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
