I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize
