awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
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